why iphones gotta take two million years to turn back on after they die like you plug em in and you’re all ready to start texting again but they’re like “nope. i gotta take some time for myself. figure out who i am. you hurt me too much the last time. let me think.”
me walking down the isle to my soon-to-be husband (drake) while 2 on plays:
him when he see me walking down the isle:
"you’re an adult now"
"you need to choose a career"
"you need to make your own doctor’s appointment"
- Mother: BUT I GAVE BIRTH TO YOU!
- Me: ain't nobody tell you to do that tho
I still want you to flirt with me."